As Long As You Still Be By My Side chapter 5

[yun_miyake]

Title    : As Long As You Still Be By My Side chapter 5
Pairing    :  Juntoshi, Sakumoto
Length    : Chaptered
Rating      : PG
Genre      : Angst, au, romance, tragedy
Disclaimer  : Never claim them as mine, they are belong to each other
Summary   : Jun lost his daughter in an accident almost two years before, but
he couldn't pull himself up from the sadness that keep haunting him,
until he and Ohno moved to a small town.....
Warning   : Sorry for the bad English

As Long As You Still Be By My Side

CHAPTER 5

Nino was so glad when Jun showed his new room for the first time, along with the studying table, big sized bed, story books and many new clothes inside the closet. Jun smiled when he saw Nino’s face which shone so bright after he explored his new room, but unexpectedly he walked to Jun again, lifted his face, opened his mouth to spill the question.

“Matsumoto san, you bought them all just for me?” he asked doubt fully, spread his sight to the room again, seems he can’t believe that he got all of these to himself.

“Yes,” Jun sat down on the floor, his eyes now facing Nino’s, he looked at the studying table and to the bed, “These are for Nino.”

“Thank you so much,” Nino bowed politely to him, Jun smiled to the kid, “There’s no need to thank me that way, this is your house now,” Jun said, he stroked Nino’s short hair, his eyes turned warm, he wanted to cry but try hard not to drop his tear in front of the kid.

“I will make lunch for us, Nino can take a rest or explore this house,” Jun rose from the chair, wiped his teary eyes when Nino didn’t see him.

“I will help you,” he put the book which he just took and approached Jun, the latter blinked confusedly, this is just like what he imagined, where Nino helped him in the kitchen, asked him many questions or cut his little hands with the knife and how he becomes panic by seeing it.   

“Can I? Matsumoto san?” Nino asked again when Jun didn’t answer him, the latter just nodded and lead the way to his kitchen, they found Ohno at the living room, doing something with his computer, he smiled to Nino.

“Enjoy your new house young boy,” he said, paused his activity on his keyboard. Jun glanced to Nino, the small kid showed his front teeth, “Yes Ohno san,” he replied politely. Jun continued his steps to the kitchen, what exactly he feels right now? Stiff, awkward, didn’t know how to treat the kid properly, as if he never interacted with a kid before. He doesn’t have any braveness to hold Nino’s hand, to lift him and kissed his cheeks, he thought maybe because this is the first day for him to be with Nino in the same house. He took the knives and some potatoes, gave one of the knife to Nino.

“We’ll peel these potatoes, be careful, the knife is so sharp,” Jun handed the knife to Nino who took the potato immediately and started topeel it, he’s even faster than what Jun thought. His hands moved fast and Jun just realized that Nino is left-handed, he smiled to himself and worked his own part, in silent, his tongue refused to speak any word, only the sound of their knives slash the potatoes which can be heard.

They finished the cooking session with silence, Jun can feel Nino’s sight followed every of his movement, maybe the young boy wanted to speak to him but can’t spell the word, just like him.

He listened to the conversation between Nino and Ohno during the dinner, he felt something was wrong with him, but what is it? They adopted Nino, they can give a little happiness to the orphan, but he still feel there’s something wrong, an imagine about someone who suddenly knock their door and claim Nino as their son and take him back haunted Jun’s mind. He washed the dishes with those complicated thoughts, until Ohno touched his wrist, wake him up from his own mind.

“Jun, are you sick?” Ohno touched his neck to check his temperature, “You look extremely pale,” Ohno’s face look so worry, Jun shook his head, put the last plate to the cupboard, and took off his apron.

“I’m okay Satoshi,” Jun answered, both of them headed the bed room, Ohno already took Nino to his room, Jun opened the door and changed his clothes to pajamas, Ohno did the same thing. They didn’t exchange any word until they’re under the blanket, Jun’s eyes are on the ceiling, still drown into his own thought.

“I hope Nino will love this house,” Ohno finally speaks, Jun didn’t know what to answer, he was happy when they took Nino from the orphanage, but right after Nino entered the house, he felt weird, like it was something which will lead them to uncertain direction, besides, he still can’t lose his sadness. Ohno had put all of Sora’s photos at the box when they packed their stuffs before moving here, the box which Jun can’t touch, actually he managed to put those photos on the wall like in their old house, but he can’t do that. The box still lay on the warehouse, untouched.

He closed his eyes, hope his mind will be clearer tomorrow morning.

***

When the morning comes, Jun’s temperature reached 39 degrees. Ohno’s voice can be heard from the bed, from what he analyzed, Ohno must attend the meeting no matter the reason. Jun tried to sit down but his head started to spin around so he cancelled it, Ohno stepped back inside, put his fingers on Jun’s forehead.

“Jun, my office…”

“It’s okay Satoshi, I’ll call ambulance if I can’t handle it anymore,” Jun took Ohno’s hand, tried to focus his sight, his vision was so blur due to his headache “How about Nino?” he asked.

“He already went to school when you’re still asleep, I’ll bring your breakfast here,” Ohno repaired the blanket to cover Jun’s body properly, “I’ll try to go home faster today, call me if you feel worse,” Ohno rise up from the bed, he came back two minutes later with the porridge, milk and medicines on the tray.

“Eat your breakfast, don’t ignore it like usual,” Ohno gave him quick kiss on his forehead, Jun nodded weakly, he wished Ohno could just stay home to accompany him, but his job demand his presence, there’s no way but to wait for him until he back home.

Jun gulped the porridge with all his effort, his mouth felt so dry and he can’t taste anything, he forced two more spoons and finally gave up, he took the medicine, drink it with the milk, flopped back to his pillow where his head didn’t bother to reduce its pain. He keeps closing his eyes, remembered that he actually has to work today, his hand searched under his blanket, found his phone there and dialed Sakurai’s office number. The middle age woman picked the phone with her usual annoying tone.

“Sakurai’s office here, may I help you?” she answered lazily, the back sound music can be heard at the office.

“Manabe san, it’s me, Jun. I can’t work today, I get fever…”

“I’ll tell Sakurai san,” she replied even before Jun finished his sentence, Jun thanked her and ended the call, he throw his phone on his blanket and closed his eyes again. They are hurt and felt burning, the medicine didn’t affect his body yet. He doesn’t know how long he needs to back asleep again, but when he opened his eyes, there’s someone on the door frame. A small figure, a girl.

“Sora,” he whispered, he saw the figure moved closer to him, he smiled with all his effort to the kid who replied it doubt fully.

“Sora,” he said again, but when the kid finally answers, it wasn’t Sora’s voice at all.

“Matsumoto san, I bring your lunch, are you feeling better?”

Jun blinked his eyes and saw Nino in front of him with his school uniform, he wears an apron and a tray on his hands, he stared at Jun with worry look, Jun massages his own head and saw Nino clearer.

“Nino, thank you so much, how was your day at school?” Jun asked with husky voice, his throat was dry and hurt. He took the glass and drinks all the water in it.

“It was fun Matsumoto san,” Nino put the tray on the table, Jun saw his face which showed him a glimpse of sadness, “You called me Sora just now, who was that?” Nino looked to Jun’s eyes when he asked the question which makes Jun’s heart fell down to his stomach, he can’t explain about Sora, moreover to Nino.

“I was dreaming,” Jun lied, “I’m fine Nino, you better take a rest too,” Jun tried to sit down, his head becomes better but his temperature was still very high. Nino’s eyes didn’t leave his face as if the kid tried to read his mind, Jun took the bowl and started eating slowly, he asked Nino again whether he already have his lunch, the latter only nodded weakly to him. His tongue can’t taste at all, so Jun gave up and put the bowl back to the tray. Nino watched him, his hands on his apron, seems that he doesn’t want to leave Jun.

“What’s wrong Nino? Do you want to say something?” Jun saw Nino’s face blushed, the kid moved closer to him and hold his hand.

“Can I accompany you here? I feel lonely in my room,” he faced down, didn’t dare to look at Jun in the eye when he’s speaking. Jun never feel this awkward in facing a kid, it took too long for him to give an answer.

“Yes, Nino can stay,” actually he wanted to deny due to the fever and it will be bad if Nino infected, but he can’t say that. Nino walked around the bed, climbed up from the other side, he sits closer to Jun.

“I didn’t have this kind of blanket when I was at the orphanage,” Nino said while drowned his head to the blanket, it makes Jun smile automatically.

“Now Nino can sleep under the thick blanket every night,” Jun wiped the kid’s head, tried hard to erase his awkward feeling and open himself a little bit more for Nino. They looked up to the ceiling in silent, Jun’s temperature lowered around 5 pm, Nino already fell asleep beside him, he watched Nino’s face which look so peaceful and calm. He finished another glass of water, felt so much better than few hours ago, forced his body to rise from the bed. His head was still a little bit sick, but not as pain as this morning, he took the tray back to his kitchen, walked slowly to keep his balancing.

He sits down on his sofa and turn on his television, there was the news about the crime in the city where he used to live, someone murdered a little kid, Jun saw the crying face of the kid’s parents and he can’t stand of it anymore, he pushed the remote control to turn the television off. He lay down on the soft surface of his sofa, Nino never asked about his parents according to Aiba. What if there’s someone who claimed Nino as their son and wants him back? Jun never be able to push that thought away, Ohno told him that he’s too worry about everything. He told Jun to relax and stopped become paranoid, but he can’t.

“Matsumoto san,”

Jun heard Nino’s voice, the kid already awake, his messy hair looked so cute on his head. “Nino, come here.”

Jun felt relieve that he can accepted Nino little by little, maybe Ohno is right, there’s nothing to worry about.

“What do you want for dinner?” Jun asked.

“Anything,” Nino yawned while covering his mouth with his little fingers.

“Let’s phone Satoshi to buy dinner for us,” Jun smiled, he pushed Ohno’s number on his phone, heard a worry tone in Ohno’s voice when the other picked his phone, Jun quickly explained that he’s okay, he only wants to order some dinner for them since his head is too dizzy to cook something. Ohno cheerfully said yes and told them to wait for about an hour.

***

“I heard that you adopted a child,” Sakurai asked Jun a few days later when he can work again, Jun is still cleaning his table and get ready to type new documents, so he didn’t catch what the lawyer said to him. Sakurai repeated and this time, Jun heard him clearly.

“Errr yes,” he answered, “I adopted him from the nearest orphanage.”

Jun tilted up to see Sakurai’s face which can’t be read, between surprised, happy and sad.

“You must be so happy Matsumoto san,” the lawyer finally smile at him, but it looks forced and not sincere at all, seems that Sakurai also have something complicated on his mind.

“Thank you, I hope I can make the kid happy just like So…” Jun bites his lip, he almost says Sora’s name, he felt that he stepped too far if he talks about it with his boss. Someone that he almost didn’t know, he distracted his face to the computer, start to work.

Sakurai also do the same thing, the room felt in silent when both of them drowned in their works, Jun’s mind flew to Nino, it’s been a month since he adopted the kid. There’s nothing happened, his days is as normal as he can expected. Nino never ask about Sora anymore and it makes Jun relieve, he doesn’t want to talk about his daughter to anyone, he only wants to keep the memories in his own head. When he walked home, he met Aiba half-way. The tall man asked him about Nino, and his happy face becomes so bright when Jun explained that Nino is easy kid and so independent, he promised Aiba that he would take Nino for visit this weekend.

“Actually I’m looking for my son as well,” Sakurai said unexpectedly, Jun’s hand stopped typing, he looked at his boss’ face, Sakurai’s eyes still on the computer’s screen. “I don’t know where to find him, since I don’t even know how he looks like. My ex-wife took him away when he’s still few months old and I just knew that the kid is no longer with her” Jun can see the sadness crossed Sakurai’s face when he said those words, “Strange isn’t it.”

Jun didn’t answer, he turned his face back to the computer.

“You must have happy life with your husband,” Sakurai continued.

“I lost my daughter as well,” Jun replied, he can’t believe he talks about it with his boss but the words already fell out from his lips.

“Are you searching for her?” Sakurai asked.

“She’s in heaven, I can’t find her in this world,” Jun bitterly smiled to his hands, but out of his realization, his tears rolled to his cheeks, he wiped it quickly, felt shy that he couldn’t control himself in front of someone else.

“Here,” Sakurai handed him the hand handkerchief , Jun took it shyly and wiped his wet face.

“Sorry,” he said, Sho smiled weakly to him, “It must be hard to let her go,” he continued. Jun nodded, this is the first time he can talk about Sora with other person, a man who is completely stranger for him. he forced a smile to his lips, right when the door opened, Manabe looked at the strange scene in front of her, where Sho is sitting on the table and Jun’s face who turned red due to his tears.

“There’s a phone for you Sakurai san,” she said while lifting his eyebrows in weird way, locked her eyes on Jun.

“Yes, I’ll answer now,” Sho get down from his table and walked out of the room. Jun sighed, what was he doing? He put the handkerchief on the table, stared at it for long time. Sho lost a son that he doesn’t know how he looks like? How come? He finished his works and went home quickly, kept thinking about it.

To be continued. 
 sorry for the late update ^____^